Difficult Decissions

The last few days I have done some heavy thinking and I have not come to a conclusion yet. My current state might be best described as "dizzy" or something the like.

As most of you might know, I am planning to go abroad again in April or May for another 3 months. Therefore I applied to various schools throughout the world - yes, throughout the world. Now I have two definite offers and both are tempting, even though in very different ways.

1st option: NAMIBIA
A few weeks back I watched a documentary on TV about Namibia (Africa, right next to South Africa and Botswana I think). The countryside looked stunning and I thought: Hey, why not go to Namibia - English and German are the official languages there! I could work as a Language Assistant. So I used the g-force (google) and found the school which had been mentioned in the documentary. I wrote a mail and they told me that they could not offer me an internship as they had already all interns they needed. But they gave me addresses of other schools in Namibia and South Africa. I wrote mails again and was surprised to get a reply: Namib High School in Swakopmund got back to me straight away and offered me an internship as Language Assistant from May to August (winter term).

I was so happy and started planning. How do I get a visa? What injections (malaria,...) do I need? How much will the flight be? Is the university here going to accept this placement, so that I do not have to pay the fees for this semester? What is going to happen to my room in Bamberg? Where am I going to live in Swakopmund? And so on.

Last week I got their letter of invitation - which is actually full of spelling and other mistakes, so I don't know what the university and the embassy is going to say. I also had an appointment with my doctor about the health risk. But I get back to this later.


2nd option: back to RMS (Royal Masonic School) where I spent my GAP year in 2001
As problems with Namibia were coming up, I decided to follow not just one paths, but two. And of course I was thinking about RMS, which I still hold in high regards (well, you know what I mean ;-)) I did not think, it would work, but on Friday night I got a mail from Kathryn Batty (she is the new GAP coordinator at RMS) and she told me that they could offer me a placement (Trinity term 23rd of April to 12th of July) and she was waiting for my reply. GREAT!

AND THIS IS WHERE THE TROUBLE STARTS!!!!!

You know that feeling when you deep in your heart wish that something is not going to work out somehow, so that you do not have to take the decission yourself? This is how I feel at the moment. First I wanted to make a pros and cons list, but I knew instinctively which option would win and would have more pros on its side.

There are a few points to consider, however:

• The flight to Namibia will cost me between 800 and 1000 Euros, so nearly all of my savings would be gone.
• At the end of July a good friend of mine is going to get married and she already blackmailed me: "We gave you warning of this event early enough, so don't tell me you won't be in the country!"
  
• My grandparents have their 50th wedding anniversary at the last weekend of July.
• I have to hand in my thesis by the 1st of April, the result will be out on the 1st of July, I have to get it "transformed" for my second degree by the 5th of August, which is the last day to register for my final exams - so I better should be in Bamberg.
• RMS is going to pay pocket money (I guess GAP salary or less) and offer food and accomodation of course.
• Namibia will provide accomodation and pay a bit of pocket money.
• My flat in Bamberg has to be paid for no matter where I go.
• I need various "health measures", which will cost me at least another 500 Euros (anti-rabies inoculations, cholera, malaria, meningitis,...) for Nambia.
• The visa will cost me 130 Euros, not included various special documents (clearing certificate, radiology reports,...).
• I already know RMS - Namibia would be a new adventure!
• Nambia might be a one and only chance!
• It is easies to communicate from England, especially considering that I am in the middle of preparing for my final exams!
• A very good friend of mine is also in London from March to June, would be a lot of fun I guess.
  
• ...

Well, you see where this is heading and which option might win. But I would be very grateful if you could comment on this - what would you do? Or what counts more: family - friends - adventure - experience - money....

A good friend of mine said: "For me the only question you have to ask yourself is: does it get you any further (life, personality, studies, experience,...) and if so, which option can give you more back (best pros and cons in balance)?"