Dreams

Last night in the end I forced myself to open the letter. What can I say, I am surprised and really disappointed at the same time.

Surprised, because my grades in English were better than expected, really disappointed, because my history grades seem not really fair. I studied for my history exams (see exam update 4 and 5) for more than 6 months and in the end it was worth nothing, I could have get the same grades without doing anything at all in preparation. This is frustrating.

The worst thing, however, is something different. It is still a good grade all in all, but I missed the target that I needed for a Phd by 0,04 points! This is ridiculous! All because of the written history exams, because my oral exams in that subject could not have been any better. This is just not fair, what are 0,04 points in comparison to 13 exams?????

I am not sure if my exam-celebration at the beginning of August is taking place, because at the moment I do not feel like celebrating. And I find it even worse to motivate myself for my master exams, because unfortunately History Didactics is not a subject of my master degree and therefore it becomes a bit "useless" to go on with it as well. Furthermore, now after this option is gone, I feel even more certain that I do not want to end up in school in September!